My mother-in-law Pari whom is in-tune with I guess we would call it the metaphysical… said my aura has changed since 2020.  Yes, I am at peace.  My children are in trustworthy hands until this god damned mess my ex created is resolved.  I praise their current caregivers, especially Caitlyn’s, Vicki Montgomery, who can’t possibly be any closer to my child than myself.  She is absolutely amazing and I thank god this woman is there to support my darling teen just as I would while their father abandoned them during our time of difficulty.  I have asked this woman to please stay in contact with Caitlyn when this nonsense is over because I can see a positive relationship outside my own motherhood when I see it.  Caitlyn needs a backup reassurance that she is a strong young woman.  She is almost 14 years old, still believes in at least the idea that Santa Clause is the spirit of Christmas.  Myself as an adult, still believes in the spirit of Christmas, having endured the worst that life can expose me to involuntarily over the past 2 years.  To be honest, my experience with inmates behind bars have been my best experiences of Christmas and the lord i’ve ever seen in my entire life.   To value me as a human, to celebrate ME, as a creator and influencer, knowing i’ve always been innocent was a true blessing.  The worst people in the world valued me as an icon of change.  I would give my life for those I love without question.  I have been betrayed in prison by those I trusted, helped and stood by, knowing I was that human they would never regret knowing…  but they have failed me.  If only L.B. or Melissa Pemberton knew what a positive friendship post-prison would benefit them as support was.  I guess the drug and thug life took over them again and they will find themselves as career criminals when it doesn’t have to be.

I saw my time in prison as a way to convert others to a lifestyle that just doesn’t have to be.  It pains me and kills me internally that these women chose to sell out to the gangsta lifestyle rather than the hope that I could help them be a better themselves with some inspiration was not the choice.  I subjected my husband to providing my own charity to several inmates beyond myself.  I projected the good in my heart to Jason whom agreed to my vision to help these people I could believe could be reformed.

I learned the worst lesson.  Never trust anyone who is a criminal.  That realization killed me.  I supported Brittni Pozza, Melissa Pemberton, and several others with assurance of care and love from one to another and the minute they were released forgot about me, the one whom supported them tons during their incarceration.  It devastates me.  I never had to deal with helping people that did not appreciate it after the hardship ended.  What do I make of this?  I’m so confused.  My life is to help others, but when betrayed by those who you help, and you feel taken advantage of, you are left confused and hurt as how to proceed. I thought by taking advantage of being wrongfully thrown in prison that I could help those other folks on the inside that were wronged as well without being taken advantage of but, these are criminals, a lot of them, and they conned me.  I have hope for one more person, Joclyn Hopp.  She is not incarcerated for drug related crimes but mostly battery related crimes and spent 4 years in a county jail and 2 years in the state prison before she is released in about 90 days.

Her character is amazing. Not once did I experience her personality as being threatening in prison for violence.  She is a tender hearted, caring individual who held me up during a medical incident when everyone else walked by and ignored me.  She was my strength to continue my last few months.  Without her I feel my life would have ended in the state prison. She was my gem that I last remember looking at in her arms before I lost consciousness in Feb. 2022.  She had just had surgery on her foot and had a metal plate installed, and she leapt with a run injuring herself further to help me.  I can never forget my hero that day, I believe was 2/15/2022.  I was traumatized by my husbands grandmothers death and some comments he made about our relationship and that just set off a series of neurological events that I cannot recall.  I have a memory of looking up at Joclyn holding me and 2 Florida D.O.C. doctors ultimately fired for malpractice, Dr. Wallace, and Dr. Rodriguez, whom tried to cover up the medical episode after having me fall off a stretcher and Dr. Rodriguez telling Dr. Wallace to forget and never mention of the incident (thank you to an inmate witness for that!).

The Florida D.O.C is corrupt.  There is no rehabilitation.  During my 18 months with them I was offered no programs to help rehab me or anyone else that I could see, except for “SSCI” inmates who are actually the stupidest and worst of all inmates.  Alfreda Gunn… I look up to her. They tried to hurt her/him by putting bleach in her chow hall drink, but another officer stood up for what was right and told.  I took care of a patient paralyzed from the neck down by officers I believe at Lowell.  I had to hand-feed her as my time as part of my infirmary assignment.  They threw her in the last room in the infirmary and some inmates forgot to feed her not knowing she couldn’t help herself. I was burdoned with the task but afraid of the liability possibility by having her choke as I hand fed her.  This woman couldn’t even turn her head side to side and she had bed sores on her scalp, especially behind her ears.  I had to adjust her legs and her head without appropriate medical supervision and I was scared.  Thankfully she was only at the women’s reception center in Ocala for about 4 days.  Word has it she was the victim of officers seeking retaliation at Lowell CI.

Then we have the case of Sgt. Buttons who got an inmate pregnant and then had the inmate beaten at Lowell CI.  His comrades ended up with prison time but this son of a bitch ended up as a Sergeant working mostly the tower but sometimes directly with inmate populations at the women’s reception center in Ocala, FL. The Florida Department of Corrections has a tendency to re-assign the most horrific corrections officers from their main correctional institutions after being disciplined for horrific acts to the Florida Women’s Reception Center.  They do not fire problematic officers.  These officers kill inmates, harass inmates, disable inmates, and Secretary Dixon just relocates them because of the severe shortage in officers.

OK well I thought i’d vent this morning. This is important to my incarcerated people.   I am on the side of incarceration malpractice despite the crimes they originally committed. I truly have a cause worthy of my effort.